Friday Clutter: Mitch McConnell, Ivanka Trump, Rudy Giuliani, NFL Playoffs, Tampa Bay Rays, Adele, Meat Loaf, and more
Monday Clutter: Bill Barr, Newt Gingrich, Goldman Sachs, NFL Divisional Round, John Stockton, Hugh Hefner, Pearl Jam, Bastille, and more

Sunday Clutter: Trump, Senator Sinema Censured, SNL, Tucker Carlson, Bitcoin, NFL Playoffs, Lucifer, Coldplay and BTS, and more

Hi folks,

How are you?  Weekend going okay so far?  No complaints on this end.  I ran the usual Saturday errands and then enjoyed some playoff football.  It looks like today will probably be pretty quiet.  I need to take one quick trip after we're done here, and then it's back to watching the games.  BDH and Little Buddha prefer watching the Patriots play, but they still enjoy the drama of the postseason, even when it involves other teams.  However, let's check out the headlines before we do any of that.  The guys made coffee, so grab yourself a nice medium DD, because it's time to clear out some Sunday Clutter.

As his legal losses continue to grow on multiple fronts, Daily Beast columnist Margaret Carlson wonders if Donald Trump would be willing to sacrifice his kids in order to save himself.  Ivanka is the only one we have any question about, but the Great Pumpkin would throw Don Jr. and Eric to the wolves faster than you can say "con man."  In fact, deep down, we suspect he'd enjoy it.

Meanwhile, Donald Trump doesn't like that the January 6 House select committee wants to talk to Ivanka Trump.  The man who tried to make Hunter Biden the defining issue of the 2020 presidential election thinks it's "unfair" that the committee is looking at his children.  As always, Trump remains the king of projection:

“It's a disgrace, what's going on. They're using these things to try and get people's minds off how incompetently our country is being run. And they don't care. They'll go after children."

Donald Trump Ivanka Trump January 23 2022Donald Trump's self-pity has no limits.  (pic via nzherald.co.nz)

The Arizona Democratic Party officially censured Senator Kyrsten Sinema yesterday for voting to maintain the filibuster and block the advancement of voting rights legislation.  Outrage continues to build in the state over Sinema's continuing obstructionism, and she has a choice about her political future in 2024:  She can run for re-election as a Republican, or she can cash out and leave to work as a lobbyist for one of her donors, but she won't win another term as a Democrat.  Rep. Ruben Gallego is already talking about a primary challenge, and Arizona Democrats will make sure it's successful if Sinema decides to remain in the party.

Let's get SNL's take on current affairs this week:

SNL does a good job of making fun of Fox News, but sometimes there's just no topping the original source for comedy.  Take for instance, Tucker Carlson actually getting angry about M&M's becoming "less sexy."  Listen, we're not here to judge anyone's sexual fetishes, but they don't need to be broadcast over the airwaves.  Republicans have a traitorous dim-witted failed casino operator as the head of their party, and a guy who has the hots for the Green M&M is their top spokesperson.  This is not the "best and the brightest" this country has to offer.

Also, if we have to buy more M&M's just to make Tucker Carlson mad, so be it.  We're willing to make that sacrifice for the greater good.

If you're a guy who hasn't gotten vaccinated yet, pay attention:  A new study says the coronavirus vaccine won't reduce your fertility, but being infected might.  Is it really worth that, just to "own the libs?" 

Bitcoin has lost half its value since November, and there's no reason to believe the fall won't continue.  The Clutter investment team thinks cryptocurrency is one big scam, so they're happy to get out of the way of this mess and continue focusing instead on stocks.  The staff feels a little bad for ordinary people who are taking a hit on this collapse.  However, this whole thing has been propped up by bros, and that's always a red flag that should be seen from a mile away.

Speaking of stocks, Netflix shares fell 20% on Friday, after the company announced slowing growth predictions.  The Clutter investment team doesn't know if this is the beginning of a long-term slump for the streaming giant, or if it's just a bump in the road.  However, this is why our crew prefers mutual funds over individual stocks.  They find it much easier to focus on long-term trends for segments of the market instead of individual companies. 

Sorry to anyone who bet on yesterday's NFL playoff games because of our predictions.  We went 0-2 on Saturday and couldn't be happier about it:

First, the Cincinnati Bengals upset the Tennessee Titans 19-16 on Saturday, thanks to a game-winning 52-yard field goal, as time expired, from rookie kicker Evan McPherson.  Bengals quarterback Joe Burrow was sacked a NFL record-tying nine times yesterday, and yet still kept his cool long enough to lead his team to a win.  That's impressive.  Some people are comparing Patriots quarterback Mac Jones to Burrow, and we're good with that.

The Titans had a chance to win the game in the final minute.  However, quarterback Ryan Tannehill thew an interception with 20 seconds left in the game that set up the Bengals final drive (and also probably cost him his starting job next year.)  Cincinnati won its first playoff game in 31 years last week, and now they're off to their first AFC Championship Game since 1988.  You gotta love it. 

That was fun but, then the San Francisco 49ers beat Aaron Rodgers and the Green Bay Packers 13-10 on a frigid Lambeau Field, and that could be the highlight of the postseason.  The Packers scored a touchdown on the opening drive of the game, and for a while, it was starting to feel like that might be the only scoring of the night.  However, San Francisco pulled off the upset, thanks to a busy fourth quarter that saw a blocked punt returned for a touchdown and another game-winning last-second field goal (this one from Robbie Gould.)   The humiliating defeat leaves Rodgers free to go back into his cave, rambling about being cancelled and espousing his anti-vax/pro-MAGA garbage, because he once again couldn't get the job done when it mattered most.  Just tremendous.

That brings us to today's games.  First up, we've got the Tampa Bay Buccaneers facing the Los Angeles Rams this afternoon.  The Rams beat the Bucs 34-24 the first time they met this year.  Tampa Bay is dealing with a number of injuries on offense, and we're looking for another Los Angeles win today.  Of course betting against Tom Brady is never a smart move, but Tampa Bay's season ends here.  The question is whether or not it's TB12's last game.  He'll drag out his answer to keep some leverage over the team, but we'll go with no, because he's constantly talking about playing until he's 45 years old, and it will hurt his business if he hangs it up a year early. 

Then the Kansas City Chiefs play the Buffalo Bills tonight.  Our prediction is admittedly driven by spite, but we're going with Kansas City getting the win at home.  The Bills looked like Super Bowl champions in the making after blowing out the New England Patriots last week, but quarterback Josh Allen will come back to Earth a bit tonight.  We might go the other way if this game was being played in Buffalo, but Patrick Mahomes and company have home field advantage, and this ends the same way as last year's AFC Championship Game - with the Chiefs on top.

Our condolences go out to actor/director Regina King, whose son Ian Alexander Jr. died by suicide.  Alexander was only 26 years old.

Congratulations to Lucifer on being the top original streamed series in the United States of 2021.  Viewers spent 18.34 billion minutes watching Tom Ellis and Lauren German last year, and we were happy to be included in that number.  If you're looking for something to binge-watch these days and haven't already seen Lucifer, you should start today.

Hey Tiger King fans, the first trailer is out for Joe vs. Carole, the NBC Peacock miniseries starring Kate McKinnon as Carole Baskin.  We were totally sucked into Tiger King when it came out, but we'll see about investing in an eight-part follow-up, although McKinnon looks perfect for the role.  What do you think?

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  Let's have Coldplay and BTS close things out with, "My Universe" for today's, "Song of the Day."

That sets a nice tone for a quiet Sunday.

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was terrific to see you, as always.  BDH and Little Buddha say you're welcome to come back later if you want to watch the football games with them.  (They won't object if you want to bring some snacks.)  Otherwise, enjoy the rest of your day, be good, and we'll catch up with you again soon.  Until next time, that's today's Clearing out the Clutter, and we are outta here.

 

If you enjoy Clearing out the Clutter, please consider a $5 monthly donation!  You can click here or on the "Donations" category on the right-hand side of the page.

Comments