Clearing out the Clutter

Thursday Clutter

Hi everyone,

How are you?  BDH, Little Buddha and I are thrilled to see you.  I mean, we're always happy to see you, but it didn't look like we were going to be able to hang out today.  However, a window of opportunity opened, and there you are!  This calls for coffee.  Help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's clear out a little Thursday Clutter.

Former baseball slugger/steroid user/reality TV show star Jose Canseco has always been an easy target to make fun of.   However, there's nothing funny about his Twitter harassment of a woman who may have filed sexual assault charges against him.

Speaking of Twitter, they're releasing a new security measure to protect users against cyber-attacks.

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke says he's not changing his efforts to help the economy anytime soon.  Isn't it nice to have a public official who is actually focused on doing something and not just making a lot of noise?

It's clear that Clutter doesn't agree with the Vatican on policy issues anyway, but the simple fact that they have to improve their anti-money laundering efforts doesn't inspire us to be any more inclined to listen to them about anything.

Wait, a Republican governor is going to support Medicaid expansion under Obamacare?  I wonder how much longer he'll be allowed to stay in the GOP?

I have no idea what happened with this guy the FBI shot and killed after he was connected to one of the Boston Marathon bombers, but my guess is that the story will change 2-3 more times before we hear a final version. 

I know he'll be wearing a Cleveland Indians uniform, but I look forward to Terry Francona's return home to Fenway Park.  I'll be shocked if the Fenway faithful give him anything besides a standing ovation.   Don't let me down, guys.  No matter where the game takes him from here on out, Tito will always be one of our guys.

It's great to hear that Boston Red Sox catcher David Ross is apparently just about ready to come back from the concussion disabled list.  He's a great presence for the team, and hopefully he won't miss a beat after this time off. 

The Boston Bruins are on such a roll after taking a 3-0 series lead against the New York Rangers that even my friend who is a Rangers fan can't bring himself to try to talk trash.

NFL linebacker Brian Urlacher is calling it quits after 13 years with the Chicago Bears.  My favorite memory of Urlacher will be the time that Tom Brady (he of the legs of concrete) faked him out with one of the slowest moves in the history of football.  Seriously, Urlacher had a great career, and I'm not convinced he made this decision entirely on his own after being released by Chicago.  I know he had a number of injuries during his career, so Clutter wishes him good health going forward. 

(I feel like this clip was sped up, but here's the play I'm talking about.)

 

Clutter sees no reason why the New Jersey Jets should be taken seriously as long as Mark Sanchez remains the quarterback. 

Are you looking for a new Man of Steel trailer?  Clutter is here for you, my friends.  Enjoy:

 

Get More: Kevin Costner, Harry J. Lennix, Laurence Fishburne, Russell Crowe, Amy Adams, Julia Ormond, Michael Shannon, Movie Trailers, Movies Blog

Her

Here is an interesting look at how the stars of the upcoming Arrested Development revival are being paid.

Out of the darkness, Paris Hilton doth return.  What's she up to now, and will anyone care?

What's this all about?  (pic via wikimedia.org)

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  It was so much fun to hang out today, we wish we could give you all a big hug.  However, that's not going to work, so hopefully this "Clip of the Day" featuring some bulldog puppies will do:

 

Thanks for coming by, everyone.  You know you're welcome anytime at Clutter Headquarters.  Enjoy the rest of your day, and we'll see you back here again for more fun soon.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Wednesday Clutter

Hi everyone,

In case I haven't made it clear, I love the Clutter Tree.  I spent so much time watching it the rain last night, it was like I was spellbound.  The tree was one of the main reasons I bought Clutter Headquarters all those years ago, and my fascination with it continues to grow with each pasisng day.  It seemed like just a week ago that the leaves were struggling to come out, and now thanks to a few days and nights of solid rain, they're in full bloom.  They're such a lush dark green, and they fill up almost every window in the place, which can almost give the impression that we're located in the woods.  (Note: We are not located in the woods.)  It's so calming to look out of these windows, that one might think that one doesn't need to clear out the Clutter for the day.  However, one would be wrong.  So, help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's get to work.

The news out of Oklahoma is just devastating, so it was nice to see a story about a woman finding her dog in the aftermath of Monday's tornado.   As you watch the clip, tell me if you agree that the dog looks like it wants to ask, "What the #$#$ just happened?"

Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn (R) will only support federal relief aid for his home state if it comes with corresponding spending cuts somewhere else.  Let that sink in for a second.  Senator Coburn doesn't want to talk about that right now, calling it "insensitive" to discuss.  I would go with something like he's a psychopath who doesn't believe it's his job to help his constituents, especially in a time of disaster, but that's just me.

Apple to Congress:  If you're going to give us a way to legally hide billions, we're going to legally hide billions.  This isn't complicated.

I find myself a little fascinated by this poll that says a majority of Republicans don't think the 2012 presidential election was fair.  I certainly understand that they didn't like the result, but it was unfair?  Do they really in their heart of hearts believe that the Democratic Party was out sending union thugs to intimidate GOP voters, and flooding the polls with undocumented residents to commit massive voter fraud, the licks of which are unprecedented in history?   That's the only explanation they can come up with, as opposed to say, a comprehensive party platform that's hostile to everyone except wealthy white guys?  As the son of two mental health professionals, I feel qualified to say that this level of mass paranoia is both incredible and perhaps a little sad.  These voters must feel so terrified of everything that's different from them. 

First we had the Virginia GOP candidate for attorney general who wanted to force women to report miscarriages to the police or face jail time.  Now we have the Virginia GOP candidate for lieutenant governor who opposed desegregation and also compared Planned Parenthood to the KKK. Sometimes I struggle to remember that these people live in the same country that I do.

All of the above insanity is just part of the reason I'd love to hear President Obama give a Bulworth speech, like this one written for him by Ezra Klein of The Washington Post.

Apparently the Mediterranean diet can make you both healthier and smarter.  No word yet on whether or not it can make you funnier, a better listener, or more popular, but I'm sure those studies are on their way.

Who's hungry?  (pic via uwex.edu)

Myrtle the Turtle is back after some home renovations.  How do you move a 550lb/90-year old turtle?  Anyway she agrees to.  Make sure you watch the video that goes with the story.

ESPN is cutting hundreds of jobs despite being the most profitable component of the Disney empire.  Did some investor complain about the profit margins here?

Why was the Doctor Who crew in New York on Monday?

I'm not the world's biggest fan of The X-Men.  I've seen a couple of the movies on cable, but they weren't "appointment television" or anything.  The trailer for the new Wolverine movie doesn't do anything to make me change my mind, but what do you think, Clutterheads?

 

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  We're going to close things out again with one more song from The Doors.  This is L.A. Woman, which features great work by everyone in the band, it's today's, "Song of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, you guys.  It was great to see you, as always.  Enjoy the rest of the day, and come back soon so we can hang out again.  You know BDH and Little Buddha start getting restless when they go too long without seeing you.  Until next time, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Tuesday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back.  How was your Monday?  I didn't get as much sleep as I really could have used, but it was actually a pretty productive day.  I'm not sure how that worked, but hey, whatever does the trick.  Now we'll see if I can do the same thing today after getting a full night's rest.  If not, there's always coffee.  Speaking of which, help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's clear out a little Tuesday Clutter.

Our thoughts go out to all of the people of Oklahoma who are dealing with intense tornadoes.  The footage just looks terrible.

Very sorry to hear about the death of Ray Manzarek, who died yesterday from bile duct cancer.  The keyboardist for The Doors was 74 years old.  I had a big Doors phase in high school, as probably many people my age did.  I don't remember how I first became aware of them, but I thought they were everything music should be: mystical, sexual, and legitimately threatening to society. 

Who in their right mind would try to pass a law to force women to report their miscarriages to the police?  Who would possibly think of this as anything than a direct attack on a woman's privacy during a deeply personal time, and who would think that there was any justification for notifying the authorities about a medical issue and would send them to jail if they didn't comply?  Why, the Republican candidate for Virginia attorney general, of course.

Congratulations to Vermont for passing an end-of-life law.  People should be able to decide their fate on their terms.

Sunday's Boston Globe featured a moving article about the nurses who put their feelings aside and took care of wounded accused Boston Marathon bomber Dzhokhar Tsarnaev.  These women represent the better side of human nature, as opposed to the goons who made fools of themselves protesting Tsarnaev's brother's funeral.

Wait, Apple wants reform of the U.S. tax code to prevent companies from gaming the system.  Companies...like Apple?

Glad to see that Boston Red Sox closer Andrew Bailey is back from the disabled list.  Here's hoping he can stay healthy for the remainder of the season, because I think that the uncertainty around the closer situation is the biggest area of concern for the Sox right now.

Sticking around?  (pic via examiner.com)

Won't tell a lie, I had no idea that Derek Lowe was a relief pitcher for the Texas Rangers.  That lack of an impact might be the reason that the team designated him for assignment.

This week's Mad Men was too much weirdness to deal with right before bedtime on a Sunday night.  How was I supposed to be able to turn off the TV and immediately be ready for bed after that?  No wonder I didn't get as much sleep as I needed.  It might have worked better for me if I was under the influence of something, since just about everyone on the show was.  I will say that the robbery scene was one of the more effectively creepy things I've seen on television in a while.  What did you think, Clutterheads?

Wait, which one of you was I recently talking about whatever happened to Keanu Reeves with?  Argh!

I've seen a few different versions of this premise, but this guide to every running joke on Arrested Development is pretty damn impressive.

After watching the Family Guy season finale, it seems pretty clear that Seth MacFarlane is out of stories to tell with this group.  There's no harm in that, they've been on forever, but while the first half of the finale was fine at best, the second half was borderline unwatchable, which sums up my feelings about the last few years.  Time to move on to something new.

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  I think we'll let Ray Manzarek, Jim Morrison, John Densmore and Robby Krieger take us out with today's, "Song of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  We might get some rain later in the day, so try to stay dry out there, and make sure to come back for more fun soon.  Until then,we'll break on through to the other side another time, because this is the end, my friend.  In other words, that's today's Cluttter, and we are outta here.

Monday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Happy Monday.  Who's excited for this week?  I see a lot of craziness on the horizon, but as long as we stick together and stay focused, I think we'll be okay.  For now, help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's clear out a little Monday Clutter.

The Boston Red Sox and John Lackey beat the Minnesota Twins 5-2 yesterday.  You have to be encouraged by the fact that Lackey only gave up one hit over six innings.   There was a rain delay that was longer than the actual game, but it was worth it to have the Sox sweep Minnesota this weekend.  Now they move on to the Chicago White Sox, where they will hopeully continue their winning ways.

How much do you think it eats at the Minnesota Twins that they had David Ortiz and just released him?  I mean, not only did they let him go, they didn't even get anything in return for him.  Do you think it constantly eats at management, or do they just figure that they made the move that made sense to them at the time.  Or, do they rationalize it and say even if they kept him when he first turned into "Big Papi," they wouldn't have been able to keep him over the long-term anyway?  Of course, they could have traded him for prospects when he reached that stage, which brings us back to our original point.  They had him and got nothing in return.  Maybe they don't care at this point.

The Boston Bruins seem to be taking it to the next level at just the right time.  They blew the New York Rangers out of the water yesterday with a 5-2 win to give them a 2-0 lead in their playoff series.  There are few things as satisfying as Boston beating New York in any sport.  It just feels right, you know?

Congratulations  to the one person who won the Powerball on Saturday.  Best of luck with all of that money.  This is a good time for the rest of us to go back to the longer, but much more reliable way of creating long-term wealth, our good friend, the stock market.

Let me see if I've got this straight.  When all the noise and manufactured outrage about the handling of Benghazi is put to the side, it turns out that there's no proof that the White House tried to cover anything up, and the GOP knew that when they started yelling like madmen.  That sounds about right.

There was a time where it looked like Yahoo was on it's way to the great search engine graveyard, but now they suddenly have enough money to buy Tumblr.

Apparently Red Sox sideline reporter Jenny Dell's brother got married over the weekend.  It seems like Jenny never heard the saying that you shouldn't upstage the bride.

 

Nice #RedSox win (12-5 over the #Twins)! Incredible family wedding!!! All in all, a GREAT night! twitter.com/JennyDellNESN/…

— Jenny Dell (@JennyDellNESN) May 19, 2013

 

 

What happens when you cross Linkin Park with Stone Temple Pilots?

I'm still processing everything that happened in the Doctor Who season finale, including the final scene which sets the stage for the 50th anniversary special on November 23rd.  Take a peek for yourself and check out the special guest star.  You might have heard of this guy, but the question is, what's his story?  I have a good guess, but we'll have to wait until November to see if it's right.

 

Obviously I'm happy to hear that Doctor Who will be back for another season, though I didn't realize that hadn't already been confirmed.  Probably just as well, any uncertainty could have caused some sleepless nights at Clutter Headquarters.  It's great to hear that Matt Smith will definitely be back (though, again, I had assumed that), and it's fine that Steven Moffat will return as showrunner, but I hope he can get the show back to looking more like the first half of this season, rather than the painfully uneven second half.

This was the last SNL for Bill Hader, and all I can say is that he/Stefon went out in style.  Words can't do this clip justice, you'll just have to watch for yourself.

 

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  Does anyone here remeber the band White Lion?  I was on this website a few minutes ago and saw an ad for the former lead singer's current tour.   His name is Mike Tramp, and apparently he's still out there doing his thing, only now with shorter hair.  You can see for yourself with today's, "Song of the Day."

 

That was fun.

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  Like I said, I see a few hectic days ahead, but I'm sure we can get through them if we look out for each other.  On that note, be good, and come back for more fun soon.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we don't want you to Wait, because we are outta here.

Thursday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back to the house of random, and a happy Thursday to you all.  The weekend is almost here, thankfully.  However, there's still plenty to be done before then, so help yourself to a nice medium iced DD, and let's clear out a little Clutter.

Berkshire Hathway is moving some stocks around in its portfolio.  What are Warren Buffett and company focusing on now? 

Speaking of stocks, apparently nothing can slow down the stock market.  Actually, I smell a drop coming, but either I'm right about that, and there's a sale coming, or I'm wrong, and the vast Clutter portfolio will continue to swell to new heights, so either way, it's all good.

I know we talked about this for a bit yesterday, but if our deficit problem is basically solved for now, how about we start talking about growing the economy instead of stifling it with budget cuts?  How about we all finally start acting like adults and seek to find ways to solve the serious problems facing this country.  Or we could just hold the 37th vote to repeal Obamacare.

The Vatican ordered a cardinal to leave Scotland and pray for a few months as his punishment for sexual misconduct.  Here's a crazy idea, how about he faces criminal charges instead?  Is this really considered a legitimate punishment by anyone?  He's basically being told, "You've been a naughty boy.  Now go think about what you did."  With such a perverted sense of morality, criminal justice, and sexual behavior, it's still unbelievable that anyone looks to these loons as leaders of any type.

I watched the first inning or two of the Boston Red Sox game against the Tampa Bay Rays on Tuesday, and things got off to a great start when Big Papi hit a 3-run line-drive home run in the 1st.  I switched over to the season finale of NCIS for an hour, and by the time I got back, the Sox were losing 5-3, which ended up being the final score.  Moral of the story, it's a good thing NCIS is on summer hiatus now.  No more distractions!  For instance, I watched all of last night's game, and the results were much better.

By the way, don't ever make Red Sox sideline reporter Jenny Dell angry.  You won't like her when she's angry.

Dude, what the hell?  (pic via sportsrants.com)

Just two days left until the Doctor Who season finale.  Thankfully, there are still the remaining 50th anniversary specials to look forward to this year, or else I might be throwing a wee bit of a tantrum over likely having to wait an exceedingly long time before the start of the next season.

So Robin Williams is coming back to television in the fall.  I won't say that I have high expectation for his new show, but I will be happy if it ends up being any good.  I still remember when his movies and stand-up specials were "must see," and it was an exciting adventure just to try to keep up with him.  Good luck to you, sir.

Now that Happy Endings has been cancelled, will Elisha Cuthbert be heading back to the resurrected 24 as Keifer Sutherland's daughter?  I'd be okay with that.

Elisha Cuthbert (pic via webseriesnetwork.com)

Who's coming with me to The Hangover Part III?

 

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  I still can't get over that cardinal nonsense.  I'll tell you, I'd rather be a member of a religion run by the guys from Monty Python's Flying Circus.  Check them out for yourself with today's, "Clip of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  Enjoy the rest of your day, and make sure you come back soon so we can do this all over again.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Monday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back!  How was your weekend?  I had a great time with Mom Clutter for Mother's Day weekend.  I helped with some gardening tasks, and then we had a nice dinner.  The only disappointment was that the Red Sox lost both games that we watched, but other than that, it was good times.  I'm happy to say that BDH and Little Buddha did a great job of keeping an eye on Clutter Headquarters while I was gone.  They tell me that the Clutter Tree looks so good now because they spent so much time talking to it this weekend.  I was going to tell them that the rain probably had something to do with it too, but they're so pleased with themselves, I just stayed quiet.  Okay, enough catching up.  It's time to kick off the week with some Monday Clutter.

All I can say for the Red Sox right now is that it's probably a good thing they have today off before starting a series with the Tampa Bay Rays on Tuesday.  Nothing is moving in the right direction at the moment, with players getting hurt, and both the pitching and offense struggling, but this is a good team, and it is a long season, so there's plenty of time for things to improve.  My only pressing concern is what they'll do if closer Andrew Bailey takes a long time to come back from his latest injury, because that's a glaring hole in the 9th inning at the moment.

Is the stock market ever going to slow down?  It doesn't seem like it, which usually indicates that a cooling-off period should be around the corner.  Either way, we keep on keeping on, kids.

The family of the late Derek Boogaard is suing the NHL for his death, saying the league is responsible for the brain damage and painkiller addiction that Boogaard suffered from.   I imagine we'll be seeing more of these types of lawsuits, much like in the NFL, as the effects of repeated blows to the head become better understood.

This pains me, but I think I'm siding with Joba Chamberlain in his little beef with Mariano Rivera.  Chamberlain told Rivera to never again "shush" him after Rivera told him to quiet down while the closer was doing an interview nearby.  I like Rivera, and certainly much more than I like the odd Chamberlain, but I don't know where he gets off telling another player to quiet down while he talks to the press, so good for Joba for standing up for himself.

Of course the first thing I did as soon as I got back to Clutter Headquarters yesterday was cue up Saturday's Doctor Who episode.  I again let my hopes get up too high.  The story wasn't all that scary, and it jumped around too much to get a huge sense of suspense, but I will give credit to Matt Smith, who was forced to play the hero and villain in this story, and he did a great job as usual.

So now there's only one episode left to this year's season of Doctor Who, unless you're one of the people who accidentally got it early on DVD, thanks to BBC America.  I am not one of said people, so I'll be doing my best to avoid spoilers for another five days.

It will be interesting to see how Seth Meyers does as Jimmy Fallon's replacement on Late Night once Fallon takes over The Tonight Show, and by, "interesting to see," I mean, interesting to have someone tells me how it goes, because I can't stay up that late anymore.

The next king of late night television?  (pic via animalfair.com)

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  I've been thinking this whole time that we would start off the week with some kick-ass, grab-you-by-your-throat hard rock song...and then I found Richie Havens singing, "Fire and Rain," so the plan changed.  Here you are with today's, "Song of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  Enjoy the rest of your Monday, and let's do this again soon.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Friday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back, and a happy Friday to you all!  Congratulations on surviving another week.  What's that you say?  Why yes, the Clutter Tree does already look a little fuller after yesterday's rain, thanks for noticing.  It still clearly needs some more water though, so here's hoping more is coming over the next few days.  In the meantime, help yourself toa nice medium iced DD, and let's close out the week with a little Clutter.

BDH would like you all to know that a new study indicates that owning a pet may reduce your chances of heart disease.  I know I've certainly improved my cardio health since this little guy arrived, thanks to all of the chasing around Clutter Headquarters that Little Buddha and I have to do with him  every day!  By the way, Little Buddha says that he may not run around as much as a dog, but he's pretty sure looking at his smiling face every day is good for the heart, and I'll back him up on that one.

Anyone who thinks for a second that the GOP actually cares about covering people with pre-existing conditions, should never be able to vote again.

Glad to hear that Tamerlan Tsarnaev has finally been buried somewhere.  Too many people embarrassed themselves with their protests, and their reactions to said protests, over this issue.

It was so sad to read this story about a 12-year old boy who was killed after being struck by a van.  I've often ridden my bike through that area, and that intersection always makes me nervous with cars coming from a number of different angles.

If you're one of the 48% of the country who doesn't own stocks right now because you're unemployed, or struggling just to get by right now, that's one thing, but if you're not invested because you're still "spooked" by the 2000 tech crash or the 2008 meltdown, get over it and get back in the game.  You can achieve remarkable results with relatively little money if you've got enough time, but you've got to be invested first before that's even a possibility.

Among the many disappointing aspects of Wednesday's Boston Red Sox 15-8 loss against the Minnesota Twins was the fact that David Ortiz failed to get a hit for the first time in about five years.  I'm telling you, that totally shook my understanding of the world.  However, Big Papi had other things on his mind, blasting Boston Globe yahoo Dan Shaughnessy for a column suggesting Ortiz is off to such a great start this year because he's on steroids.  Ortiz has every right to be pissed.  I won't link to the article (but you can get to it if you click the link in this paragraph), but Shaughnessy makes a wild accusation, has no proof to back it up, says "everyone" is talking about it, and fails to name a single other person talking about it besides him, and slanders Big Papi because that's his schtik.  It's pathetic.

Is the Joel Hanrahan era already over?  The Boston Red Sox reliever is off to see the grand poo-bah of sports injuries, Dr. James Andrews of Birmingham Alabama, to see if he needs surgery on his injured right arm.  The best case scenario is that he doesn't need it, but even then he'll still be out at least two months.  It's too early to panic just yet, but fixing the bullpen has suddenly become a major concern for general manager Ben Cherington.

So long?  (pic via boston.cbslocal.com)

I know I've said this before, but I generally have less respect for umpires than any other officials in professional sports.  I think many of them are divas who somehow think that anyone bought a ticket to see them instead of the players.  If I was more generous, I'd say they have tough jobs and are subjected to constant criticism, but then I go back to being snarky and saying they don't make good arguments for themselves when they review a home run call on television and still get it wrong.

Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder says his team will never change its racist name.   Apparently it's the "great tradition" of insulting an ethnic group that Snyder will defend with his last breath.  He knows full well he'd never call a Native American that word to their face, and if there's any justice, he'll lose the lawsuit against the name and have to pay through the nose for it.

With Mother's Day right around the corner, it seems only fitting that we pay tribute to some of the great moms of Doctor Who.

NBC has started cancelling some shows, but Community isn't on this list, and I can't say I care about the rest of the programs, so..so far, so good?

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  In case you don't have any puppies to chase around right now, you can at least enjoy this clip of a bunch of bulldog puppies chasing their mom around.  It just shows that a mother's work is never done.  So, in early celebration of Mother's Day, enjoy today's, "Clip of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  Enjoy the rest of your Friday, and if you want to hang out again later today, you know where to find us.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Thursday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back.  How are you?  How's your week treating you?  Wednesday was pretty busy, but it never reached full "WTF?" status, so I'll take that.  We have more rain in the forecast for today, and BDH, Little Buddha, and I can't wait to see how the Clutter Tree looks when that's over.  Until then, help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's clear out a little Thursday Clutter.

The GOP isn't the only party who can use a filibuster.  Senate Democrats used the process to block an amendment that would have authorized people to carry guns around "water development projects like lakes and camp sites which are currently gun-free zones."  It's disappointing that NH Senator Jeanne Shaheen was one of the Democrats who voted or that amendment.

South Carolina is a silly place for reviving Mark Sanford's political career this week, but North Carolina is up to some nasty business with a bill that would require a parent's permission before a teen can seek birth control or be treated for a STD, substance abuse or mental health issue.  Listen, everyone wants parents and their children to have a relationship where they can openly discuss whatever issues the child is facing, and that type of communication should always be encouraged.  But we know there are many homes where that's just not the case, and no legislation can mandate it to be otherwise, so are those kids just supposed to be left at risk of getting pregnant, or suffering major health problems as a result?  That's outrageous.

It's starting to look like the stock market will never go down again, which of course means that we're about due for a major correction...unless we're not.  This is why Clutter doesn't pay any real attention to short term market news.  We have no idea what the market will do tomorrow, so we stick to our regular investment schedule, and if we happen to have extra cash at a time when the market takes a notable drop, then we throw in a few extra dollars.  This whole "trying to predict the future" thing is for the birds.

Speaking of birds, I gotta admit, I've never had a turkey come flying through a window at Clutter Headquarters, and I'm feeling pretty appreciative about that right now.  I'm sure BDH and Little Buddha would help it find its way out the door, but it would still be awkward.

By the time Tuesday night's Boston Red Sox 6-1 loss to the Minnesota Twins was finally over, it looked like I might have an opportunity to try out for back-up catcher and starting third baseman, as well as closer, but it's good to hear that David Ross and Will Middlebrooks seem to be okay.

I'm relieved to hear that Toronto Blue Jays pitcher J.A. Happ has already been released from the hospital after taking a line drive off his head Tuesday night.  Happ was motionless on the ground for about eight minutes after being struck by a hit from Desmond Jennings of the Tampa Bay Rays, and it was a scary sight.  Here's hoping he makes a full recovery quickly.

My most favorite thing about the Los Angeles Dodgers is that they took Josh Beckett, Carl Crawford and Adrian Gonzalez, and their gigantic contracts, last year.  My second favorite thing about the Dodgers is that Matt Kemp plays for them, and after you read this story about his interaction with a special fan, you'll understand why.

Cheers.  (pic via funscrape.com)

The new San Francisco 49ers park will be called "Levi's Stadium?"  Not exactly the most intimidating name ever, but when you're being paid $220 million for the naming rights, I guess intimidation isn't that high on the list of important items.  Hey, wait a second, this new stadium is in Santa Clara, California?  But they're still going to be called the "San Francisco 49ers?"  Screw that, they can join the "We don't want to admit we play in New Jersey" Jets and Giants as being the biggest liars in professional sports.  If you have to lie about where you play, you know deep down inside, in places you don't like to talk about at parties, that you've done something bad.

I'll be at Mom Clutter's house for Mother's Day weekend, so I'll probably have to DVR Saturday's Doctor Who episode, but the more writer Neil Gaiman talks about his script, the more I think this is likely to be worth the wait.  I'll enjoy some of the Gaiman experience before that, because I'm sure I'll be bringing my copy of American Gods for the trip.  I tend to read things (too) quickly, so it's been a challenge to pace myself with this book, but it's been worth the effort so far.

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  I think we'll let Mr. Eric Clapton take us out with today's, "Song of the Day."  Enjoy:

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as aways.  Try to stay dry out there, and come back later, so we can watch the Community season/series finale together.  Until then, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Tuesday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back.  We've got plenty of randomness to process, so help yourself to a nice medium DD, and let's clear out a little Tuesday Clutter.

I wish this was a horrible story from The Onion, but the officer in charge of the Air Force's sexual assault and prevention efforts was arrested for, that's right, sexual assault.

As a 93-year old man is arrested on accusations of allegedly being a death camp guard, my question is, how many actual Nazis are still alive?

I would find Clarence Thomas's conspiracy theories about "elites" choosing Barack Obama sad, and his bragging about not talking at work even sadder, if he wasn't, you know, a Justice of the Supreme Court.

Scary.  (pic via npr.org)

There's a new #1 on top of the Fortune 500.  Surprisingly, it's not Clearing out the Clutter, though I suspect that has something to do with us not generating any revenues.   I'm going to have BDH and Little Buddha make some calls and see if they can confirm that.

A new study says that way too many suicidal kids have access to a gun in their home.  It's a shame there's just nothing we can do about that, right, Wayne LaPierre?

The GOP doesn't see why you should be paid for working overtime.

Boston Red Sox reliever Andrew Bailey is going on the 15-day disabled list with a sore bicep.  Sox manager should probably stop answering questions about who the team's closer is going to be for the rest of the year.

The Clay Buchholz "cheating" story should die soon, but I have to say I love this blurb about Ryan Dempster in a recent piece by ESPN Boston's Gordon Edes:

No one, meanwhile, has done a better job of protecting Buchholz than Ryan Dempster, who demonstrated what veteran leadership is all about by pitching the next night and announcing afterward that he came up to the clubhouse in the third inning to use what Buchholz was using. Then, the next day in Texas, Dempster lined the top shelf of his locker with a bottle of baby oil, a tube of Vaseline and a container of cocoa butter.

You think Josh Beckett would have done that?  Christ, he'd be still be wandering around the locker room, threatening to get "the snitches."  You can stay, Dempster.

Alex Rodriguez won't guarantee that he'll return to the New York Yankees this season after recovering from hip surgery in the off-season.  Is it too early to start laying odds on his retirement announcement coming this year?  I'll give it a 40% chance of happening.  What say you, Clutterheads?

Filming has apparently concluded on the Doctor Who 50th anniversary special.  I can't wait until November!  Well, I can, but only because there are seven more Doctor Who retrospectives coming before then, plus there's that television movie about the creation of the show coming at some point.  Okay, I can do this...

Rumors are now swirling that Steve Carell will appear in the series finale of The Office.  I hope that's true.  Really, it would be a douche-bag move for him not give Office fans one last bit of Michael Scott silliness before the show says goodbye.

When was the last time Lindsay Lohan did something vaguely news worth that wasn't related to her drug abuse problems?  If we're generous, was it Herbie Loaded in 2005?   So, we're looking at at least eight years here, right?  I said it with Charlie Sheen, and I'll say it again now.  I'm very sorry that she apparently doesn't have anyone to pull her off the ledge, and it feels dirty (and not in a good way) any time I read a story about her. 

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  I think we'll close things out today with a clip of a cute puppy waking up in the morning.  Funny thing is, this is exactly what both BDH and Little Buddha look and sound like when they get up.  Check out today's, "Clip of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  Enjoy the rest of your Tuesday, and come back again for more fun, randomness, and coffee soon.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.

Sunday Clutter

Hi everyone,

Welcome back.  Happy Cinco de Mayo to you all.  We'll be breaking out the Cabo tequila later, but there's work to be done first, so help yourself to a nice medium iced DD, and let's clear out a little Sunday Clutter.

Shame on Harvard history professor Niall Ferguson for saying that the economic theories of John Maynard Keynes had anything to do with the fact that he was gay.  Oh, and here's a tip, Professor Ferguson:  Before you offer an insincere apology about your idiotic remarks, remember there's a little thing called "the Internet" which allows everyone to see that you've said this before.

It doesn't seem like it's already time for the annual Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting, but I guess I haven't been paying enough attention to the calendar.  Berkshire's head honcho Warren Buffett gave his thoughts on the economy and stock market yesterday, and he sounded a cautious note on both.

The Boston Red Sox knew they were looking at a challenge when they came to play the Texas Rangers, and now they're just looking at trying to avoid being swept, following last night's 5-1 loss.  Hopefully Jon Lester can help the Sox salvage today's game, but it won't be any easy task for the struggling Boston offense as they face Yu Darvish, he of the 5-1 record with a 2.33 ERA. 

Another rough night in Texas for John Lackey (pic via boston.com)

Meanwhile, reliever Andrew Bailey continues to struggle with bicep soreness which is starting to sound like a longer-term issue.  It's a good thing Joel Hanrahan is back to fill the closer's role, but what's it going to take to keep Bailey healthy for an extended period of time? It would be helpful for the Sox to be able to have a consistent closer and not have to go back and forth between these two guys all year long.

The Boston Bruins lost game 2 of their playoff series 4-2 against the Toronto Maple Leafs last night, but perhaps the bigger story was the appearance of Boston Marathon bombing survivor Jeff Bauman as the Bruins' banner captain before the start of the game.  Let there be no doubt, Boston stays strong.

 

Last night's Doctor Who episode was relatively stronger than most of the others so far this year (and better-researched than I realized).   Next week's episode was written by Neil Gaiman, so my expectations are probably already too high, and then it's the season finale the week after that.  Normally I'd be depressed about the year-long wait that's sure to follow for the next season, but there are still other 50th anniversary-related shows to look forward to this year, so I'll try not to whine too much.

I was only able to stay up for the first half of last night's Saturday Night Live with guest host Zach Galifianakis, but I thought his monologue was entertainingly odd:

 

BDH found this video on BuzzFeed.com that explains why dogs make great role models, and it's hard to argue with any of it.  Little Buddha is currently on his own search for a clip that explains why Buddha's are cool too, and we will also post that one as soon as he finds it.

 

Okay kids, that's going to do it for now.  The one other part of SNL that I particularly enjoyed was the musical guest, Of Monsters and Men, so let's have them close things out with today's, "Song of the Day."

 

Thanks for stopping by, everyone.  It was great to see you, as always.  BDH, Little Buddha and I will be celebrating Cinco de Mayo for the rest of the day, so feel free to come back again later if you want to hang out some more (and if you could bring some chips, that would be great).  Otherwise, be good, and we'll see you again for more fun soon.  For now, that's today's Clutter, and we are outta here.  Later.